Motorcycle Man Page 3

  Ben got that. It was his own thing and none of Ben’s business. He stayed quiet, waiting for Angus to get back to what had brought them to the office in the first place.

  “Don’t you need to get back out there?” Angus asked.

  Ben shook his head. “We’re just talking about proper seating and helmet safety. Candy’s practically an expert. If she needs help, she’ll come get me.”

  Angus took a deep breath and let it whoosh out as he stared into Ben’s eyes. “I guess I owe you an explanation.”

  Ben shook his head. “You don’t owe me anything, man. But I’m here to listen and I promise not to judge.”

  Angus ran a hand through those thick curls and, once again, Ben had to suppress the urge to take the man into his arms.

  “I knew someone who died in a motorcycle wreck,” Angus whispered.

  Ben had suspected that.

  “It was ten years ago. My brother…my twin brother Andrew was hit by a drunk driver. He wasn’t wearing a helmet and died on the highway.” His voice hitched as he shared his story.

  “I’m so sorry, Angus,” Ben murmured, rising from his desk and heading over to hug the man.

  But Angus put out his hands. “No! You don’t understand. It…it was my fault!” He yanked off the jacket. “I can’t do this.” He looked everywhere but at Ben before he turned on his heels and walked off.

  Ben didn’t have to follow him to know he wasn’t going back to the class. He’d left.

  Chapter 4

  He’d made a fool of himself in front of the sexiest man he’d ever met. Ben had gone out of his way to comfort the crazy man in his class and then what had Angus done? He’d run like a child.

  Again.

  Angus was so tired. He’d carried this weight for so long; there were times he felt he could sink like a stone and never find his way back up. He walked through his tiny apartment and pulled his shirt off over his head. A musky scent hit him and he took a deep breath. Ben.

  Well, he’d never see that man again. Too bad. Angus had felt a real pull to Ben and wondered if he was gay. When he’d been in Ben’s arms earlier, held so tenderly, he’d wanted to stay there forever.

  It didn’t matter anymore. He was positive they’d never see each other again.

  He glanced at his phone, noting it was barely 8:30. His big Friday night—going to bed early and alone. Angus was too exhausted to care.

  Loud knocking pulled him from a restless sleep. Someone was at his door and the entire building knew it by now. Angus grabbed his phone from the nightstand and saw it was 10:30 P.M. He groaned. When had he turned into an old man? He pulled himself up and swung his legs off the bed as his eyes adjusted to the darkened room. He rubbed his face and stared blankly at the wall. What was he doing again?

  More knocking jarred him out of his thoughts and he rose from the bed, padding down the hall in bare feet. He’d been sleeping in only fleece pajama bottoms and didn’t bother to put on a shirt. Whoever was at the door was probably someone he knew. Who else would come to his apartment unannounced this late on a Friday night? He flipped on the switch in the entryway and reached for the door handle.

  He opened the door and found Ben standing there, hands braced on the doorjamb. Angus stared. Damn, what was he doing here?

  “I was worried about you,” Ben told him.

  Crap. Had he spoken aloud?

  “You going to let me in?” Ben raised an eyebrow as his gaze slowly traveled down Angus’s body.

  Angus stepped back and pulled the door wider, unable to speak. Ben stepped in and glanced around the tidy living room. Angus closed the door but remained silent.

  Ben smiled at him. “I guess I woke you up.”

  Angus nodded, still not understanding what the hell was happening.

  Ben pulled off his jacket and set it on top of the black leather recliner before turning his attention to Angus. Something in the way he stared made Angus shiver, and it had nothing to do with being cold.

  Angus swallowed hard and tried to calm his growing nerves. “W-what are you…?” His voice trailed off as he swung his arm out to the side, gesturing at the living room.

  “What am I doing in your apartment?”

  Angus nodded.

  “I told you. I was worried about you.” Ben took a step toward him.

  “I-I’m fine,” Angus lied.

  Ben looked like he didn’t believe it. “Really?” Big brown eyes stared him down.

  Angus’s shoulders slumped and he shook his head. “No,” he whispered. What was it about Ben that made him want to reveal everything?

  Ben moved quickly and, before Angus could even process what was happening, he was wrapped in Ben’s arms, held tight against Ben’s broad chest, their hips and thighs pressed together. He breathed in and smiled, remembering just a few hours earlier when he thought he’d never see the man again. Angus wasn’t sure why he’d been wrong, but he wasn’t going to argue while he felt so incredibly secure in Ben’s embrace.

  “I shouldn’t have let you leave,” Ben murmured, his lips so close, Angus felt hot breath against his ear.

  Angus pulled back a little and looked into Ben’s eyes. “Of course you should have. You had a class to teach. And why would you chase after me? You barely know me.”

  A small smile played on Ben’s lips and his eyes flashed when he looked at Angus. “You’re right. I barely know you. But getting to know you is my new goal in life.”

  Angus’s eyes widened in surprise. “Why?”

  Ben chuckled. “Because you’re smart, interesting, sexy, and you have the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen.”

  Did he just call me sexy? Angus untangled himself from Ben and stepped back, narrowing his eyes.

  Ben’s brow furrowed. “What?”

  Angus didn’t say anything as he scrutinized Ben. Was the guy messing with him? He knew he wasn’t sexy. Hell, he was so skinny, he used to be called Skeleton in high school. But this wasn’t high school and Ben’s demeanor seemed genuine. Still…

  Ben took a step forward.

  “Don’t.” Angus put out his hand to stop Ben. “Is this some kind of setup? Or are you so upset someone doesn’t like motorcycles, you’re here to sweet talk me into changing my mind?”

  Ben’s eyes rounded in surprise and his mouth gaped. “Is that really what you think?”

  Angus stayed silent, staring at Ben.

  “Shit. I guess I really messed this up,” Ben mumbled, shoving his hands into his front pockets. “All I wanted to do was make sure you were okay. I really was worried about you.” He looked down at the floor and sighed.

  Shame welled inside Angus. He had truly misread the situation. “I…I’m sorry, Ben. I…your compliments…I’m sorry.” He shrugged in defeat. “It’s been a hard couple of days. Dealing with…everything.”

  “I know. That’s why I’m here. I got the feeling earlier that what you told me…wasn’t something you usually talked about.”

  Angus walked around the coffee table and plunked down on the sofa, letting his head fall back. He threw his arm over his eyes and fought back tears. “Yeah. Actually you’re the only person I’ve ever told.”

  Ben joined him on the sofa, settling just inches away. “Why?”

  Angus lifted his arm to look at Ben. “Why did I tell you? Or why haven’t I ever told anyone else?”

  “Both.”

  “I don’t like talking about how my brother died. I mean, people know he passed away, but they don’t know it was my fault.” His voice hitched and he lowered his arm back over his eyes. “It’s too…heavy…to burden anyone with, if that makes sense.”

  “It does.” Ben’s voice was soft.

  Angus pulled his arm away again to glance over at Ben. The living room was dark, but the light spilling from the entryway allowed him to see Ben’s face. His eyes were intense and fixed on Angus, and his lips were pressed into a thin line.

  Angus straightened and scooted over until their thighs were touching. “I feel like I
want to tell someone everything,” he whispered, not dropping his gaze from Ben’s.

  “I’m right here,” Ben whispered back, placing his hand on Angus’s thigh.

  Angus felt something akin to relief flood through him and he blinked back tears. Maybe sharing would help. Hell, the counselor he’d seen for an entire year following the accident had tried telling him that, but even she hadn’t been able to break through his barriers. Yet here was Ben, ready and willing to listen. It was up to Angus to take the leap.

  He took a deep breath and jumped.

  “Andrew and I were out with friends.” His voice trembled and Ben tightened his grip on Angus’s leg. He took a deep, shuddering breath and forged ahead. “I met this guy at the bar and we…we were really hitting it off. Andrew said he was getting a headache and wanted to leave.” He glanced at Ben. “We’d come together in my car,” he explained.

  Ben nodded and waited for him to continue.

  “I kept telling him ten more minutes because I was having such a good time and…shit!” Angus raked his hands through his unruly curls. “I was thinking with my dick and not caring that my brother wasn’t feeling good.” He hazarded a glance at Ben again, and when he saw no judgement in the man’s gaze, he closed his eyes and continued. “I finally got the guy’s number and looked around for Andrew, but didn’t see him. Someone told me he’d left with our friend Mike.”

  “Mike rode a bike?” Ben guessed.

  Angus nodded. “Yeah,” he answered, his voice shaking. “And he didn’t have an extra helmet, so I guess they thought they could make it since it was such a short distance home, but…they were hit by a drunk driver. Some idiot who’d been arrested more than four times before for drunk driving. He shouldn’t have even been on the road.”

  “Shit,” Ben hissed.

  “Yeah…” Angus agreed, quietly.

  “Did Mike make it?”

  Angus shook his head. “They both died on impact.”

  Facing Angus, Ben cupped his cheeks and brushed away tears Angus hadn’t even realized were streaming down his face.

  “You’ve been thinking this was your fault for ten years?”

  Angus nodded. “It was,” he claimed. “Andrew died because of me!”

  Ben pulled him close. “Shh. You did nothing wrong. This wasn’t anyone’s fault. Sometimes there’s no rhyme or reason to a tragedy. Sometimes it just is.”

  Angus shuddered hard as hot tears fell and something that felt like freedom rolled through him. He didn’t have time to analyze it as Ben pulled him closer, until he leaned against Ben’s chest, snuggled between Ben’s thighs. Ben stroked his hair and murmured words Angus couldn’t make out, but they didn’t matter. It was the way Ben held him. The way Ben didn’t judge. For the first time since the wreck a decade ago, Angus was finally able to let go and grieve.

  He wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that on the sofa. At some point he’d cried himself to sleep. When he woke they were stretched out, himself against the back of the sofa and Ben’s arm crooked around him.

  The light was still on in the entryway and Angus briefly thought about getting up to turn it off, but then Ben shifted in his sleep and pulled Angus closer. For the first time in years, he felt at peace.

  He wasn’t sure what, if anything, was going to happen with Ben, but he would never forget what the man had done for him. Angus closed his eyes and breathed in Ben’s scent, letting it lull him back to sleep.

  When morning came and his bladder forced him awake, Ben opened his eyes and took stock of where he was. He smiled when he realized Angus was still in his arms. Funny, this was probably the best first night he’d slept with a man and they hadn’t had sex. Hell, they hadn’t even kissed.

  He shifted and his bladder complained, so he tried to slip his arm out from under Angus without waking the man. He failed.

  Angus blinked at Ben, a tiny wrinkle between his eyes.

  “Morning,” Ben said.

  A sleepy smile spread across Angus’s face. “Morning.” Angus stretched, jostling Ben, which reminded him once again that he needed to get up.

  “Bathroom?”

  Angus sat up and let Ben have his arm back. “Down the hall.”

  Ben hated pulling away from Angus, but nature called. He rose from the sofa and headed down the hall.

  When he was done and back in the living room, he was disappointed to see Angus wasn’t on the sofa anymore. Ben found him standing in front of the refrigerator in the small kitchen.

  “Angus?”

  Angus turned and smiled. “Want something to eat? I don’t have a lot in here, but we could figure something out.”

  Ben glanced at his phone and shook his head. “I wish I could, but I have to get to the shop. The last day of class starts in less than an hour. Remember, this is the all-day class?”

  Angus frowned. “Yeah. I remember.”

  They stared at each other, neither speaking. What was there to say when they’d spent the night holding each other on the sofa? What was the protocol for this? If it had been a hook-up, and anyone but Angus, Ben would have been out the door after the deed.

  Angus chuckled. “Awkward?”

  Ben smiled. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t sure what to say. I have to go, but…I’d like to see you again. And no, I’m not pushing you to come to class.”

  Angus looked surprised. “You want to see me again? After I cried all over you? I’m a mess.”

  “Then you’re a beautiful mess,” Ben said, walking toward him.

  Angus laughed. “Um, that was pretty cheesy.”

  With his hands on Angus’s hips, Ben pulled the man closer, until they were only inches apart. “I know,” he answered. “But it doesn’t mean it isn’t true. Can I see you again?”

  “Yes,” Angus breathed out.

  Ben wanted to kiss him, but wasn’t sure the moment was right. They’d shared something so intimate last night, yet sexual desire hadn’t played a part in it. He leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss on Angus’s cheek before stepping back.

  “Can I call you later?”

  Angus’s hand flew up to his cheek and a light blush covered his skin. He nodded.

  Ben smiled. “Talk to you then.”

  When he pulled the door shut behind him, he couldn’t help but whistle as he made his way to his vehicle. He couldn’t wait to get the day over and spend more time getting to know Angus.

  Chapter 5

  “Someone’s in a good mood,” Amelia cooed as they met in the hallway.

  Class was about to start and Ben was reading over some of the items he wanted to make sure the students understood. He looked up at her and scrunched his brow. “What?”

  His sister laughed. “You’re humming and you’ve got a spring in your step. What happened? You get laid?”

  “Amelia!”

  She smiled. “I just like to see you happy,” she told him. “You’ve been alone too long.”

  Ben sighed. “I know, sis. And yeah, I…kind of met someone.” He wasn’t ready to tell anyone about Angus, though. He hoped something was happening between them, but he didn’t want to jinx himself.

  She narrowed her eyes and looked him over. “Well, if he makes you happy enough to hum while you work, then maybe he’s the one.”

  He rolled his eyes. “We just met. Stop. Please.”

  “Fine. But you’re not getting any younger, little brother,” she reminded him before wiggling past him and continuing down the hall.

  Despite not being able to get Angus out of his mind, the morning flew by. When he let the class go for an hour to grab some lunch, he called Angus.

  “Hello?”

  “Angus? Hi. It’s Ben.” Why the hell was his heart starting to race? It was just a phone call.

  “Hi,” Angus’s voice lowered. “How’s class going?”

  “Everyone’s on lunch break. It’s going great.” Ben paced around his small office, looking at the piles of all the projects he needed to be working on. “I was wondering if you
were busy later?”

  “Today?”

  Shit, I hadn’t meant to come across as so needy. I should’ve waited.

  “I’m not busy. If you meant today, I mean,” Angus said quickly.

  Ben smiled and his breath came out in a whoosh. “Great. Class ends at six P.M.”

  “How about I meet you there and we kind of make up plans as we go?”

  “That sounds great, Angus.”

  They said their goodbyes and hung up.

  Ben spent the rest of the afternoon trying to keep a big grin off his face.

  About five o’clock, he was watching the students ride—one at a time—around the course. It was Shirley’s turn and she gave him a thumbs up as she mounted the bike. “Ben?”

  He spun and grinned when he saw Angus. “Hey! What are you doing here so early?”

  Angus shrugged. “Just…wanted to come watch, I guess.”

  “Great! Shirley’s about to ride the course.”

  Angus moved next to Ben and they all watched as the oldest student in class maneuvered her way through the course. She was a little slow, but she managed without any issues, and as she crossed the finish line, everyone clapped and cheered for her.

  As the group rushed over to congratulate her, Angus bumped his hip against Ben’s.

  Ben grinned. “I know the real reason you came early. You just wanted to see Shirley on a bike, right?” he teased.

  Angus blushed but looked Ben straight in the eye when he answered. “I wanted to see you. I kind of…missed you.”

  Ben’s heart swelled as Angus uttered his admission. “Yeah?”

  Angus nodded.

  Ben looked over at the class and saw they were all busy with Shirley, so he turned his attention back to Angus. “I’ve been thinking about you all day.”

  Angus’s blush spread down his neck. Ben remembered how creamy Angus’s skin had looked without a T-shirt last night and his cock twitched.

  “I’m going to finish up and then we’ll head out, okay?”

  Angus nodded.

  “You thought of anywhere you want to go?” Ben asked, gesturing for the group to join him.

  “Your apartment?”